双语幽默：心情不好，一起笑笑吧

Mr-Mac

1、A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor,  
Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"  
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."

2、The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子.过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里. 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好.你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生.”那小男孩说.

3、Speeding  
A speeding motorist was waved down by a police patrol car.“I'm going to give you a ticket for speeding,” said the policeman,writing his note.“You've been driving over 60 miles per hour.”  
“Would you mind making it 100,officer?” was the reply.“You see,I'm going to sell the car.”  
超速行驶  
一名超速行驶的驾驶员被巡逻警车拦住后,警察一边做记录,一边说：“我要给你开一张超速罚单,因为你刚才的车速已经超过了60英里.”  
“警官,请你把时速写为100英里好吗?你知道,我正要打算卖这辆车.”

4、The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.   
When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,   
“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refund   
you the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husband  
asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”   
“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.   
“It’s not worth seeing.”   
“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.   
“Wake the child up and let him cry.”      
一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。进电影院时，服务员对他们说：“如果你们的儿子哭了，你们就得出去。不过我们会给你们退票的。”大约半个小时以后，丈夫对妻子说：“你觉得这电影怎么样？”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。”妻子回答说，“真不值得看。”“我也不喜欢看。”丈夫说：“叫醒孩子，让他哭。”


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